Using DBT Skills to Manage Anxiety Symptoms

Life is very hard sometimes. It’s easy to get bogged down with stress and anxiety and let your worrisome thoughts overwhelm your mind. You may have found yourself losing pleasure in the things you once enjoyed. You may feel more restless and irritable. Or, missing work or class, and isolating yourself from others. Or, you have trouble falling asleep at night because you’re so anxious. Yet, you only wake in the morning and worry some more.

Things have become so overwhelming that it’s hard to think in a clear way. You long for a way out and peace of mind. Something has to change so you can be happy again. But, you’re not sure what that thing is.

The good news is you can achieve mental clarity. And, using some well-known DBT skills can help you overcome these struggles. This blog will outline these skills to instill hope for a brighter tomorrow.

Understanding Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)

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DBT is a type of treatment that’s most often used to treat borderline personality disorder (BPD). But, the skills taught lend themselves well to treating a variety of other concerns. Dialectics are the foundation of DBT. It’s the idea that two different things, like change and acceptance, can exist at the same time. It’s the idea that you can accept the challenges in the present that exists. But, also acknowledging that change must happen in the future.

There are some skills that I find very useful when helping clients with anxiety. In particular, extreme anxiety. I will detail these below.

Self Soothe

When you’re feeling anxiety it's important to know how to self-soothe. This helps you ground yourself from the emotional turmoil you’re experiencing. We do this through our five senses: see, hear, taste, smell, and touch. The goal is to observe using your senses so you can take your mind off your worrisome thoughts. You can do this in any number of ways, whatever works best for you. But, here are three examples:

  • Eat a piece of candy or chocolate and observe how it tastes.

  • Rub a soft piece of fabric and observe how it feels between your fingers.

  • Listen to music and lose yourself in what you hear.

Check the Facts

It’s easy to exaggerate when you’re feeling anxiety. For example, you may feel like everything is going wrong and you can’t do anything right. This may make you isolate yourself from others or shut down due to the fear that things will get worse if you try. Yet, that only makes you more anxious in the long run.

But checking the facts and asking yourself if everything is actually going wrong can help. Check the facts and challenge your interpretation of them. You may find that your reaction to the events that are making you feel anxious is extreme.

Radical Acceptance

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This is a powerful tool to use in the face of anxiety. The idea behind radical acceptance is acknowledging without question that some situations are out of your control. So, you should not judge them. This will help you reduce the pain you associate with the troubling event. This does not mean that you agree with the situation that’s happening at all. You can hate it. But, you’re no longer fighting to keep it from happening.

When you’re in this mindset you can alter your actions based on the reality you’re faced with. You can think of new ways to cope or handle the tough situations you’re in.

Here’s an example:

You’re a med student and have a big exam coming up. You are very worried about failing because it could keep you from becoming the doctor you long to be. You become irritable and grouchy with the people around you. Even though you study a lot, you just can’t seem to relax.

If you practice radical acceptance you accept that your exam is very important and challenging. But, you don’t fight against these thoughts and make yourself miserable by studying all day and night. Instead, you give yourself a break. You allow yourself to enjoy life and take time for self-care in the midst of studying.

DEAR MAN

This is likely my favorite DBT skill. This is because it can be used in so many different types of situations. This can help people assert themselves and ask for what they need or want when. Especially when they feel overwhelmed or anxious.

DEARMAN stands for: Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, (be)Mindful, Appear confident, Negotiate.

Let me break those down for you a bit:

  • Describe: describe your need or want and be specific.

  • Express: tell others how you feel and how that relates to your needs and wants.

  • Assert: Tell them when you need them to meet your request

  • Reinforce: praise others for meeting your request

  • Appear Confident: Although you may be a ball of nerves when you make your request, appearing confident leads to greater success.

  • Negotiate: Be open to other solutions and compromises.

Other Things You Should Do to Cope with Anxiety

Give Yourself Grace

It’s understandable you would feel anxious when life gets overwhelming. But, a powerful antidote is practicing self-compassion and gentleness with yourself and others. It is a good way to cope with your emotions instead of criticizing yourself for how you approach challenging situations.

This may mean saying to yourself "Life is very difficult sometimes. I may be gentle with myself. It's hard to balance all my priorities."

Allow Yourself Some Downtime

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Life can get hectic when anxiety grabs ahold of you. You may feel like you have to push yourself to get everything done. But, you must take a moment to rest. Resting is productive. It is much harder to continue at your fast pace and meet all your goals if you don't rest on occasion.

I know that our society praises hustle. But this is only sustainable for so long before you become so anxious that you get burned out. Allow yourself to rest; your mind and body will thank you.

Make a List

List making is a great way to avoid the anxiety that comes from disorganization or overwhelm. Put all the things out of your head and on paper. This will allow for some relief from keeping track of everything. Thus, creating more ease to focus on the most important item. You will feel relieved when you realize that all your tasks are organized in one place. It also allows you the opportunity to focus on the most important tasks.

Furthermore, you can make a list of your favorite things. Reminding yourself of the things that bring you pleasure is a great way to boost your mood. It can be an effective way to help you focus on some self-care.

Begin Anxiety Treatment in Atlanta, GA

Coping with the stress life throws at you can be difficult. But, we are here to offer a supportive haven. Our caring therapists would be happy to offer support from our Atlanta, GA-based therapy practice. To start your therapy journey, please follow these steps:

  1. Click the button below to schedule a free consultation

  2. Meet with a caring DBT therapist

  3. Begin DBT therapy, and start thriving!

Other Services Offered with Avalon Psychotherapy

Anxiety treatment is not the only service offered at our Atlanta, GA-based practice. Other services offered include DBT therapy, life transitions therapy, teen therapy, young adult therapy, and DBT group therapy. We also provide online therapy in Georgia. For more information, feel free to learn more about our practice or visit our blog!

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